Joshua Ang | Joshua Ang, a Singapore MediaCorp Artist

http://ronmarie.com/numbers/?p=853

SERIOUSLY???

REALLY???

I SUSPECT SOMEONE IS STALKING ME.

But seriously, I’m pretty impressed.

30th July. I didn’t think it’d come this fast.  Two years in the company, I think I picked up pretty much. Had my fair share of  life ups and downs. Faced quarter-life crisis a lil’ earlier than people of my age. But it might not be a bad thing after all, since I’m on my way down to mid-life crisis sooner than anyone else.

Roads in life diverge. Sometimes into two, three, or more. Some routes might appear to have been less traveled . But that doesn’t make me afraid. I don’t believe in fate. That’s what I tell everyone. I believe in making choices, sticking to it. And playing your best with the hand that you’ve been dealt with. That’s all that matters. That’s making a difference.

Life is a hella game, only one that you can’t stop. You meet teams that you have to compete with, and you just can’t say no. Sometimes you fall. Why? Just to learn to pick yourself up and continue fighting. Sometimes you lose. Why? Just to know it takes more than a fight to win a game. It’s that courage to continue, that makes the difference in every game.

Whether you choose to board an ark made by amateurs, or board the Titanic made by professionals-Anonymous, make your decision, and stick to your choice.

Wake your dreams, or step into reality. Whether you go for your dreams or decide to play the best game ever, make that difference.

I wanna extend my gratitude to Jean. Who reminded me, that even in the darkest of time, I could be happy. And it’s just a flick of a switch. You just got to keep searching for that switch.

You made me think I’m happy. I thought I was. But now I know I am.

When I heard the news today,  I closed my eyes and began to pray. Oh how quickly, he can take a life and hold it back into his hands. Oh how quickly, he can actually make lives turn around in an instant.

I took a deep breathe, and told him to let me be the man I have to be. To show love, to show everything, before it feels like for ever.

Rest in peace my dear friend.

Sometimes when I drive, I know where the next road leads me to. Sometimes I just spin around in circles, and find a road to nowhere. Sometimes I tell myself I still believe. I still believe that there’s something left for me. Sometimes I lose my mind second guessing every thought. That something inside is already gone.

Sometimes I try to save myself, but it seems that I’ll just lose you. Sometimes when I try to reach for you, it just seems that there’s no one to hold on to.

I went to see my mom today. Because I know she’s the only one who’ll still wrap her hands around me when all else fails for me. Then it hit me. Who else would?

Sometimes I think I’ve seen my fair share of life’s up and down, or how quickly life can actually turn around in an instant. I guess it’s just a judgement on us all.

Sometimes I wish I was a Daffodil that never bloomed.

Moods that take you, then erase you. Words that fall through, then fool you. Reasons that move you, then bereave you.

Everything was just a plastic protocol.

Everything was just an illusion.

An illusion of a mirage of Hope and Love.

It was your human emotions, that were altering the truth.

He gives Life to Lives as a gift with great Love.

He designed Life to require the aid of other Lives.

He designed me, to aid you.

Why me?

Yes, me.

Because I don’t need you to leave the drama behind you and move into light. You can just come to me.

You don’t have to see the upside of things and be ready. You can just come to me.

You don’t have to leave the blame behind you and create the life you want to live. You can just come to me.

You can just come to me, and allow me to help you.

Because I’m here to aid you.

Just to aid you.

Sometimes an angel needs help too.

There was once this sweet little boy, so innocent, so sweet and pure. His eyes were always open, always sure, and everyone could just look right in. People followed closely to his gaze, as he looked up towards the sky. But he watched their faces drift away when other things caught their eyes.

He dreamt of sharing his heart. He dreamt of baring his soul. But now, his heart just beats empty and cold. And with all the tears that he had shed, his soul is now just a colour of his sins.

It was a battle, of his sins and death. A war waged by himself to play himself out. But now he stands with a hangdog heart, condemned.

On a sinking boat that’s pointed home.

That’s where he is.

All I can say, was I knew him back then. When he was beautiful, before.

The more I live, the more I realize the impact of perfection in my life. Perfection is not a destination, it’s a journey with no end. I’m not perfect, but it scares me because I’m nowhere near it.

People tell me that nobody is perfect. Then they tell me practice make perfect. Sometimes I wish they’d actually make up their mind.

Glad it hit me just fine.

Well, Jesus saves anyway.

Strength?

It’s passion. An indomitable will, with a made up mind. It’s not winning. It’s going through hardships and deciding not to surrender. It’ll only be born then, in the deep silence of long suffering hearts. It’s holding together with efforts and struggles even when all fails.

And I’m not strong. Even the strongest man isn’t, when he’s standing alone..

Although I’m not alone, I’m still dreaming. And I know, it’s only a dream. And only when we dream together, it becomes a reality.

Come now and take my hand, and I’ll show you how to grow out of our weaknesses.

Hello Goodbye, I missed you.